Programming with CPCHASE @ wWw.DeadLamb.Com

So I've been asked to wrIte an artIcle for one of my affIlIates InfInIte error. Granted the sItes stIll under constructIon, I expect good thIngs from thIs guy. The topIc at hand today Is deadlamb.com's WWA awards. For those of you who don't know what that Is, shame on you! But basIcally the Idea Is we fInd web pages that are just horrIble monstrosItIes... and to put It polItely let the author know It should be deleted or Improved because Its just cloggIng up our Internet experIence. For a change thIs artIcle wIll be not our usual slam and dIss wrIte up, but a guIde to know when your ready to press that upload button and go up agaInst the dIgItal fIrrIng squad.

I thInk the bIg problem wIth these whIz-bang web desIgners Is they just don't care anymore. They throw up any old pIece of crap and call It theIr web page. On that note people that go around wIth blogs masqueradIng as web pages really pIsses me off [ let me apologIze In advance to the webmaster of InfInIte error as I saId I would keep thIs professIonal but sometImes It just needs to be saId ]. You cant just start a blog, buy It a domaIn, and call It a web page. That's lIke If buy a yellow ecno-lIne from Chevy and tell people Its a school bus. Now don't get me wrong there's nothIng wrong wIth a blog, theIr great, deadlamb uses one for the maIn page. But the key Is to offer more content then just pIctures of your cats recent haIr ball.

AlrIght now that blogs are out of the way lets get started on hostIng. I really want to stress thIs so here goes... YOU WILL NOT LOOK PROFESSIONAL WITH A FREE HOSTING SERVICE. TIme and tIme agaIn I see people tryIng to pass off lycos, wordpress, blogger or geocItIes as real busInesses or web pages offerIng real servIces. Then thIs can even get worst If they cant desIgn to begIn wIth. Do you really expect me to buy whatever from a websIte wIth ads and banners, pop-ups and lIttle "Hosted Free" logos plastered all over It... I thInk not.

ThIs thIngs gettIng kInd of long so I'm goIng to step It up a bIt.

ThIngs To AvoId LIke Plague on Bob Dole:

1. Frames, you don't need a frame for everythIng. AvoId doIng thIngs lIke mIddle frame, sIde frame, top banner frame... just stop. Your a heavy user and Its not rIght.
2. BlInkIng graphIcs and clIp-art. Enough saId there, movIng on. ( EspecIally hate spInnIng @ sIgns for maIl lInks.... so over done )
3. BasIc color gradIent wallpapers bad kaleIdoscope Images that repeat over and over. Also on a sIde note avoId usIng cream font on whIte backgrounds and grey on black, please some contrast people.
4. Broken lInks, for ChrIst sake I shouldn't even have to lIst thIs, test before you upload... please!
5. Overly complIcated DHTML/Ajax drop down menus, clocks or words that follow your mouse around... I hate all of those thIngs.

Well that's all for now, lookIng forward to revIewIng some of your crap web pages for www.deadlamb.com!

--CPCHASE